it's hard to poke yourself in the eye!

I was recently given a sample pair of color contact lenses and I thought, hey maybe if my eyes where green I would no longer need to beet the throngs of girls off me with a stick (and that would be a much needed relief). So I have tried a few times now to put these thin layers of squishee goop on my eye ball to no avail. the general conclussion I have reach is that it is hard to poke yourself in the eye.